Russ read face tentacle erotica, does Justin believe in aliens? Maybe, the juxtaposition of Unsolved Mysteries, Xtro has a weird Japanese overtone, alien shower technology, making a big thing out of waking up covered in blood, moldy cheese math, Russ’s snake nightmare, screaming at the Toys-R-Us lady, Justin isn’t allowed …

Is Russ an alcoholic? Is Russ a nice guy? What’s a gayby? 16 year olds think they know what art is, everything is something, giant babies and gym teachers, Scientology, calling hospitals, getting your eyes dilated feels weird, Toys R Us sells horror stuff, making fun of the president, Justin …

Justin starts off with an apology, then they both get a little political kinda, Russ learns how to take a bath, Justin has YouTube to watch, Russ may have committed a crime, Justin has a unified theory of horror, the worst running joke, the story of the final scene, more …

In Memorium, Justin has a cold but doesn’t know it yet, Chicago pizza > St. Louis pizza, smuggling cow eyeballs, Facebook famous, Daddy’s hurting (again), Russ has a new book recommendation, public shaming, Vile Consumption, this episode is fueled by hate, Bob Vance, worst audio ever, think fast!, adults have …

Saxophone Ryan is here! and so are Ben and Tom Kerosec, Tom Kerosec’s band Kerosec has a new album, free domain name suggestion, surround sound over the phone, Ben doesn’t know how podcasts work, the best Burger King story ever, Saxophone Ryan learns what a synopsis is, candles exist, vibrating …

We have a sponsor! We’re bad at ads, so buy their stuff, Ben’s back, gay hookups in Disney, Russ is still a bad person, really funny stories about death, fat guys at Long John Silver’s, when your titles sound like bad ripoff Mario sounds, finding your director in the woods, …

Russ reads and has an epiphany, Justin is lazy, go watch the Maximum Overdrive trailer right now, cocaine as an alternative fuel source, equipment malfunctions, Stephen King is probably not racist but is definitely irresponsible, noculars, Russ and Justin talk about Cool Runnings for like ten minutes for no reason, …

Justin spent the week crashing the server and buying a home, poo tasting, disrobing, old daytime talk shows made Russ question his sexuality, Palm Pilots used to be a thing, Russ doesn’t know phrases or math, OKCupid has weird questions, abginas, this movie makes no sense, Virtual Boy was also …

Russ has a money-making idea, the friends you tell and the friends you never tell, how Russ will make money if the podcast fails, Bobcat Goldthwait is an awesome guy, St. Louis style pizza is an affront to God and nature, what to do if you wind up in Branson …

Sex talk follow-up, bad words are cool, Justin is learning how to adult, dueling synopses, Russ has totally seen Star Wars, catcalling is different from flirting and Stockholm Syndrome is different from bad writing, Patty Hearst is a person who exists, vampire preppers, Justin and Russ agree: True Blood got …